Sod the old git, bring back the ginger pisshead
Somehow in round two we avoid our normal collapse. Pete knows enough about hockey to say that it starts with a pushback, and between us we manage a pretty good stab at naming all the British winners of the Nobel Prize for literature. We don’t manage to work out the animal whose name is also the acronym for the Harry Potter equivalent of A-levels, which turns out to be newt rather than toad. We decide to have a few bitter recriminations, as I say I knew it would have a W in it and the others demand to know why I didn’t mention that. I did, but they weren’t listening.
When the results are read out, we’re in second, but Chris is tonight’s quizmaster and he seems to have taken some kind of offence at our team name and states very clearly that we are not going to win tonight. We thought no-one would be too upset by our comment on some Liberal Democrat leadership issues, but it seems Chris might be a hardcore Ming fan.
Can we even hold onto second place? Round three is pretty tough but a question asking for all the countries that border Algeria is a big help. I love this kind of question and we get all six right (Libya, Tunisia, Morocco, Mauritania, Mali and Niger). And after much scribbling and disagreement, we also manage to name seven of the last eight foreign secretaries. The only one we miss out is the man who is in the job right now - his name’s Milliband or something, apparently.
As round four progresses, we discover that Chris is not a diehard Campbellite, but that Marcus has been spreading the vicious rumour that the ‘old git’ was Chris and that ‘ginger pisshead’ refers not to Charles Kennedy but to Evil Patrick. At least two other regular quiz setters think that ginger pisshead might refer to them. Patrick seems very offended that someone might call him ginger. We set the record straight, but still we don’t win - second place is ours, though, and we each go home £4.33 richer.
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